How my brother’s death brought a memorial to remember…
A Memorial to Remember
On Monday, August 4, I received a very difficult phone call that would instantly launch the McKenna family back home into our most personal mission field.
My mother called to tell me that Sean, my 55-year-old brother, had died very suddenly of a heart attack and his former spouse and children were left to pickup the scattered pieces. Thankfully, they were open to being helped.
CLICK HERE or the picture box above to play Sean’s tribute video.
Sadly, Sean’s passing was very sudden, but not overly surprising. During the covid season he had made the decision to leave his wife and children and re-chase his dreams of working as a professional drummer.
Suffice to say that my older brother’s lifestyle choices during this season adversely affected his family relationships…and his health.
My Fleshly Frustration
I must admit that as Sean’s family began making funeral plans, in my flesh I started becoming increasingly more frustrated. For context, my entire extended family are non-Christians so their vision for his “celebration of life” involved a musical focus with nothing “churchy”, and certainly no “Bible thumping”. Yet, they were still hoping that I’d be willing to officiate, even if the memorial happened in a hockey arena.
“But, Lord, how can I possibly be Your faithful witness while honoring their wishes of not evening opening your Word?”
And it was through asking this question that I was moved to read this powerful passage of Scripture: “Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time. Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.” (Colossians 4:5-6)
Evidently, it would be through much prayer, walking in wisdom, and demonstrating consistently gracious speech that God would be glorified and non-Christians would be reached in this tender situation.
His Spiritual Discernment
As I continued in prayer to sincerely serve Sean’s family by helping facilitate a plan that wouldn’t violate my Christian conscience, the Holy Spirit began clarifying a pathway to an open door for gospel witness. As God graciously gave me greater spiritual discernment, the two themes that I sensed He would use to build bridges between me and my lost loved ones were family and closure.
First, family. Being the first and only born again Christian in my entire family (and a missionary evangelist as well!), I’m sure you can appreciate the fact that my lost loved ones have DEFINITELY heard the gospel from me over the years. So, with a multitude of “restrictive requests” placed on my gospel witness with them in this crisis situation, how might I water the gospel seed I’ve already sown? Well, I prayed about it and then pulled together my wife (Dawn) and boys (Joshua and Caleb) and requested that we all fly to Halifax together to allow the fruit of our family to be God’s testimony of His gospel grace. So not only did me, Dawn, and our boys spiritually and physically unify together as good Christian soldiers for this tour of duty, but each of us also served Sean’s family in very practical ways in preparation for the memorial service (Dawn designed and printed the funeral programs, Caleb produced the video you watched in this newsletter, and Joshua ministered to his cousins relationally).
Second, closure. We all need closure when dealing with the death of a loved one, and different people find closure indifferent ways. As I prayed about how I might share a message of hope at Sean’s memorial without “Bible-thumping” anyone, God gave me gracious words to share on the common conversational ground of closure.
Memorial Message Transcript
Download Memorial Message Transcript (10-minute read)
Click above to read a transcript of the message of hope and closure I shared with 200+ family and friends at my brother’s memorial service on August 16th.
As a fellow ambassador of Christ and partner in His gospel, it’s my prayer that these words will help edify and equip you for gospel witness with your own lost loved ones.
How God Comes Through
With so much prayer happening before, during, and after Sean’s memorial and committal services, I am humbled with how God again came through…right down to His miraculous provision of holding the evangelistic event in a disarming hockey arena rather than a “churchy” religious building! Further, not only were my words warmly received, but I believe that God is graciously drawing Sean’s surviving family into salvation through Christ.
As I process God’s amazing grace and power through this difficult experience, here are 3 takeaways He taught me that apply to all His followers and gospel witnesses:
Pray. In the context of evangelism, Paul says: “Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving.”(Col. 4:2, ESV). Let’s pray continually and thankfully for more boldness and more gospel opportunity.
Preach. In this same passage Paul also says: “At the same time, pray also for us, that God may open to us a door for the word, to declare the mystery of Christ, on account of which I am in prison— that I may make it clear, which is how I ought to speak.” (Col. 4:3-4, ESV). Let’s also ask others to pray that God will open doors for us to preach His Word to lost loved ones in clarity and power.
Persevere. Finally,Paul pleads: “Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time. Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.” Among other things, this is a clear call to persevere in wisdom and grace with all the lost loved ones God has providentially surrounded us with, trusting He will eventually save them!
Will you please continue praying?
Please continue praying for God to graciously grow all the gospel seeds that were sown back home in Halifax this summer, and that He would lift our lost family and friends out of the mud and mire and set their feet upon the Rock of Christ!
In closing, I personally praise God for graciously using me as His mouthpiece to honor my brother and give an entire arena of lost loved ones a memorial to remember!
In His Love,
- Please pray for God to graciously grow all the gospel seeds that were sown in the hearts of all those back home in Halifax this summer.
- Please pray for our ministry as we on-ramp new team members to further our goal of equipping entire churches for evangelism together.
- Please pray for the planning and promotion of our November Gospel Galas and for every table to be filled with generous supporters.